Life Together In A Real Marriage!

Life Together In A Real Marriage!

As my husband and I celebrate our wedding anniversary today, I am reminded of a statement in a talk given by Ann Romney at the National Republican Convention in Tampa, Florida in August 2012, when her husband, Mitt Romney, accepted the bid to run for president.  Ann Romney eloquently addressed the criticism that the opposing pundits had made that she and her husband had a “storybook” marriage and were out of touch with the everyday struggles that most Americans faced.

“I read somewhere that Mitt and I have a storybook marriage.  Well, in the story books I read, there were never long, rainy winter afternoons in a house with five boys screaming at once.  And those story books never seemed to have chapters in them called MS or breast cancer!  A storybook marriage…?  No, not at all.  What Mitt and I have is a real marriage!”  

“In This Together” by Ann Romney

Enjoying The Journey Of A Real Marriage!

Several years ago I framed a quote I love that expresses perfectly the journey of life together in a real marriage!

(Click HERE for free download of this quote.)

I love the rhythm of a marriage that has survived some tough times and has built a formidable stability founded in mutual respect, commitment and perseverance….. but that doesn’t mean we should ever stop trying to do those things that help make our marriages stronger!

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water, when you get used to it, it ain’t so hot!”  Minnie Pearl 

I had to chuckle when I came across an old 1959 Reader’s Digest article my mother had saved on making marriages happier and more exciting!

What A Husband Can Do:

1. Bring her flowers while she can still smell them.
2. Even if you’ve been married a long time, compliment her cooking.
3. Ask your wife’s advice on business problems and sometimes take it.
4. Learn some new jokes for the sake of your wife, who has heard the old ones too often.
5. Acknowledge her hard work as much as you do your own.
6. Surprise your wife with kind gestures for no reason.

What A Wife Can Do:

1. Don’t tell him your problems until you’ve fed him.
2. Don’t shush your husband if he sings at parties or acts the clown.
3. Don’t ever borrow his razor.
4. Show some measure of excitement when your husband gets home.
5. Remember the things you said and did to land him and try them again.
6. Don’t give him surprise parties.

What You Both Can Do:

1. Occasionally, treat each other as if you’re meeting for the first time.
2. Stop keeping up with the Joneses.
3. Avoid getting mad at the same time.
4. Don’t sacrifice all your fun today for what you think may be security tomorrow.
5. Switch off the TV and talk.
6. Build each other up in public.  Don’t try to compete.

Seems like pretty sage advice that can apply to our marriages today, even if it is a little tongue in cheek!

Thoughts About Real Marriages!

I asked some of my friends and family members to share their thoughts on what seemed to make their real marriages work…

♥ He goes in for a hug when I’m doing the ugly cry, instead of running away.

♥ He doesn’t ask why things seem so hectic when he gets home, he rolls up his sleeves and asks how he can help!

♥ She always compliments me on something she thinks I’ve done great that day!

♥ We make goals, then research articles and find pictures on how we can work together to accomplish them.  

♥ I try to do things she hates doing the most, and she does some of the things I dislike doing.

♥ He makes a special effort to dress nice when we go out for a date night.

♥ I understand that most days it’s not about me and try to truly love selflessly!

…one of my very favorite thoughts on a real marriage came from a good doctor friend of mine…

♥ She shows love in kind, subtle ways when I’m distracted and least deserve it.

I may be a bit of a romantic, but I’m so glad that one of the important things my real marriage has taught me is that…

I would love for you to share some of the things that make your real marriage special!

–Mary