Life Together In A Real Marriage!

Life Together In A Real Marriage!

Love story quote.

As my husband and I celebrate our wedding anniversary today, I am reminded of a statement in a talk given by Ann Romney at the National Republican Convention in Tampa, Florida in August 2012, when her husband, Mitt Romney, accepted the bid to run for president.  Ann Romney eloquently addressed the criticism that the opposing pundits had made that she and her husband had a “storybook” marriage and were out of touch with the everyday struggles that most Americans faced.

“I read somewhere that Mitt and I have a storybook marriage.  Well, in the story books I read, there were never long, rainy winter afternoons in a house with five boys screaming at once.  And those story books never seemed to have chapters in them called MS or breast cancer!  A storybook marriage…?  No, not at all.  What Mitt and I have is a real marriage!”  

“In This Together” by Ann Romney

Enjoying The Journey Of A Real Marriage!

Several years ago I framed a quote I love that expresses perfectly the journey of life together in a real marriage!

Gordon B. hinckley quote.

(Click HERE for free download of this quote.)

I love the rhythm of a marriage that has survived some tough times and has built a formidable stability founded in mutual respect, commitment and perseverance….. but that doesn’t mean we should ever stop trying to do those things that help make our marriages stronger!

Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water, when you get used to it, it ain’t so hot!”  Minnie Pearl 

I had to chuckle when I came across an old 1959 Reader’s Digest article my mother had saved on making marriages happier and more exciting!

What A Husband Can Do:

  1. Bring her flowers while she can still smell them.
  2. Even if you’ve been married a long time, compliment her cooking.
  3. Ask your wife’s advice on business problems and sometimes take it.
  4. Learn some new jokes for the sake of your wife, who has heard the old ones too often.
  5. Acknowledge her hard work as much as you do your own.
  6. Surprise your wife with kind gestures for no reason.

What A Wife Can Do:

  1. Don’t tell him your problems until you’ve fed him.
  2. Don’t shush your husband if he sings at parties or acts the clown.
  3. Don’t ever borrow his razor.
  4. Show some measure of excitement when your husband gets home.
  5. Remember the things you said and did to land him and try them again.
  6. Don’t give him surprise parties.

What You Both Can Do:

  1. Occasionally, treat each other as if you’re meeting for the first time.
  2. Stop keeping up with the Joneses.
  3. Avoid getting mad at the same time.
  4. Don’t sacrifice all your fun today for what you think may be security tomorrow.
  5. Switch off the TV and talk.
  6. Build each other up in public.  Don’t try to compete.

Seems like pretty sage advice that can apply to our marriages today, even if it is a little tongue in cheek!

Thoughts About Real Marriages!

I asked some of my friends and family members to share their thoughts on what seemed to make their real marriages work…

♥ He goes in for a hug when I’m doing the ugly cry, instead of running away.

♥ He doesn’t ask why things seem so hectic when he gets home, he rolls up his sleeves and asks how he can help!

♥ She always compliments me on something she thinks I’ve done great that day!

♥ We make goals, then research articles and find pictures on how we can work together to accomplish them.  

♥ I try to do things she hates doing the most, and she does some of the things I dislike doing.

♥ He makes a special effort to dress nice when we go out for a date night.

♥ I understand that most days it’s not about me and try to truly love selflessly!

…one of my very favorite thoughts on a real marriage came from a good doctor friend of mine…

♥ She shows love in kind, subtle ways when I’m distracted and least deserve it.

I may be a bit of a romantic, but I’m so glad that one of the important things my real marriage has taught me is that…

Love quote.

I would love for you to share some of the things that make your real marriage special!

–Mary

Hello February! 5 Ways To Have A Lovable Month!

Hello February

I don’t know about you, but with all the snowy weather and gray skies of January, I welcome February with open arms!  At the very least, planning some fun Valentine activities has the potential for sparking a festive spirit of love this month!

5 Ways To Have A Lovable Month!

1.  Set the mood!

Valentine's Day decorations.

While we don’t often decorate for other holidays like we do for Christmas, a few fun love reminders scattered around the house can’t help but set the mood for a more loving month!  I got these letters from Pier 1 Imports and glued them on a glittered background before putting them in an old frame I dug out of storage!

2.  Make plans!

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(#Plan journal via A Beautiful Mess)

The notion that we have to plan for love doesn’t often fit our romantic fantasies…but planning for a really important aspect of our lives, when we’re busy with so many other things, is simply a reality for most of us if we want to keep those love vibes going strong!  Penciling in a fun breakfast date or an hour at the bowling alley after work–or any other activity that creates a break from our usual routine and helps us focus on our loved ones for a while, is definitely worth the effort!

3.  Get inspired!

Hallmark movie, "TheWishList!"

(via Hallmark channel’s “The Wish List” with Jennifer Esposito and David Sutcliffe)   

Sometimes we just have to find some inspiration to help reignite those feelings we had when we first fell in love!  Perhaps watching a “sappy” love story or reading a good book together, even attending a fun marriage workshop, will help remind us of those quirky things we love most about our spouses!  I also think it’s fun to ask friends and family members what they do to get their romantic cupid on!

4.  Show everyday love!

Love quote.

As much as we might love the grand overtures of romance on occasion, it’s often the little day to day acts of love that seem to have the biggest impact in our lives!  Being on the giving and receiving end of a beautiful smile, a warm hug, a sincere compliment, a handwritten note, kind encouragement, or thoughtful service will not only help make showing love a daily habit, but we will likely find ourselves looking forward to sharing love with others more and more each day!

5.  Be good to yourself!

Be good to yourself!

(via Manicure Station)

It goes without saying, that as women, we often take care of others needs before our own–but doing a few little things for ourselves is a sure way to guarantee that we’ll be better prepared to approach our daily responsibilities with more love!

Perhaps Mark Twain had the best insight on love…

Mark Twain quote on love.

I hope everyone has a fabulous February and that Valentine’s Day is just one of many wonderful days this month for you! 

What kinds of things do you do to celebrate Valentine’s Day and those you love?

–Mary 

Healthy, Wealthy And Wise! Calories, Cash And Celebrating A New Year!

Healthy, Wealthy and Wise!  Calories, Cash And Celebrating A New Year!

I hope everyone enjoyed some fun family time, yummy food, and neat gifts during this special holidays season.  In anticipating the arrival of a new year, I thought I’d share a few things that are on my mind for this December “Healthy, Wealthy and Wise” journal entry.

Healthy, Wealthy and Wise! www.mytributejournal.com

Having realistic expectations about your daily challenges is perhaps the most important ingredient to living a happy, healthy and rewarding life!   Marilu Henner, actress

Being healthy. www.mytributejournal.comIt seems to go without saying, that a common New Year’s goal for almost everyone is to live healthier.  For me, this includes taking a common sense approach; voodoo diets or quick-fix tactics just don’t work.  I have found that it seems to work best if I try and incorporate a few key core strategies that ultimately become a part of my overall lifestyle.  In my studies about nutrition over the years, one factor is always proven true…calories count!

Put it in simple terms, calories are defined as units of energy supplied by food we eat.  In order to maintain a healthy body weight, the calories consumed from food must be balanced by calories used in normal bodily functions, daily activities and exercise.

As I researched information to help me be more resourceful in losing a few pounds recently, I came across this video by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention that effectively outlines how finding a good life balance by counting calories, eating healthy and exercising doesn’t need to be too complicated…a reminder we all need once in awhile.

Gaining wealth. www.mytributejournal.comNo doubt, after holiday expenses, most of us are feeling a little cash crunch as we pay off our bills and start to think of financial goals for the new year ahead.

Although my husband and I both work hard and try to budget sensibly, if we ever do find ourselves wanting to add a substantial amount to our savings plan or help our children with unexpected expenses they might have, we’ll often revert back to the cash system we used to help us with our finances when we were younger.  In the card-swiping culture we live in today, it’s a good way to really see where your money goes and reign in unnecessary expenses.

money

After establishing a written budget, make and use cash envelopes.  In addition to making an envelope for specific monthly mortgage and utility bills, make ones for categories like: groceries, drug, home improvement, entertainment…etc.  There’s nothing quite like the visual reminder of spending cash instead of plastic to keep your spending under control.  I think it’s fun once in awhile to see if you’re up to the challenge of using cash for most of your expenses.

Using wisdom. www.mytibutejournal.comI love celebrating the arrival of a fresh new year and the anticipation of what might be ahead in the upcoming year, but as stated in this previous journal entry, making new year’s resolutions tends to make me a little grumpy!  But recently, I heard about a smart way to outline goals so that they’re a lot more doable and a little less daunting.

Often, it is simply a matter of having a more focused mindset as to how we’d like to accomplish the goals we have set for ourselves, then breaking them down into smaller increments so we can make wise choices to achieve them.

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Whether you’re one to make New Year’s resolution lists or not, I think it seems like a good idea to try and be better at celebrating the imperfectly, perfect things about ourselves!  Let’s also try and find a little bit of magic in each day too!

curly_girl_design_live_imperfectly_card_large

Here’s to being “gloriously ourselves” in 2016!!!

I’d love to hear about a goal you accomplished this past year? 

(Look for fun, new “Balanced Lifestyle” journal entries coming in 2016!)

–Mary